Nobody Seems to Likes You, Huh?

Just put lunch in the microwave oven. Set the timer for 5, hope that's enough time to share something that's been on my mind since morning...

So you've always been the pride of your parents, a well-mannered, well-cultured, morally upright straight-A student well on your way to graduating with a First Class from Nigeria's most prestigious university (I'm sure we all know which one is, hehe). One humid Thursday evening as you sit out on your veranda trying to review your notes, getting ready for the tests you have the following morning, your best friend comes crying to you recounting how much of a mess her life has become.

Yeah, the poor confused young woman feels totally at ease telling you how she feels about the fact that she had 6 carryovers last semester (of course you've never even come close to a B, how could you possibly comprehend?) and how her typical Nigerian no-nonsense parents have threatened to disown her if she doesn't get married to the father of the baby she's pregnant with...at 19 (shocked?). She knows she would feel better having a friend who really cares to confide in, an ear to whisper everything into now that it's way too much for her feeble heart to bear, but guess what? You're listening alright, but rather than listen with the aim of offering "Bestie" support in these dark hours of hers, you're listening with keen attention...just waiting for the perfect timing to remind her how much of a failure and disgrace she is and rub it in her face that she's one more person you're better off than. Dear friend, is this you?

Human beings from the very inception of time have been a very wonderful species...wonderful's just the word. Some of us have been blessed by God with such extraordinary grace for the benefit of not just ourselves, but that of everyone around us. It really hurts to see those of us who are capable of helping those we claim to love only hurt them. Most of us are guilty of this knowingly or otherwise, I can't even claim I'm entirely innocent myself (and if I've ever done this to you I'm really sorry. You know Michael would never hurt a fly...purposely).

The truth is that there's nothing as good as having someone to talk to when things get rough...trust me, I know... But there's equally nothing as bad as pouring all of it out and being on the verge of feeling relieved only to be reminded that you have a problem and see your listener gesticulating, thanking God he's never been in your shoes (I've actually seen people do this). Are you that kind of friend? For crying out loud I would only come talking to you because I realise I need help. Don't remind me I need it, offer it.

I'm definitely not an expert at this, but if you ask me, the next time a person comes emptying their soul to you, be empathetic. Be sensitive. Put yourself in their shoes. Reassure them that everything's going to be alright. Pray with them. Let them know they can always count on you in such times. If there's any reasonable advice you have to give, by all means do. Most times all people need is a sincere listening ear that understands. You don't know whose life you just might have saved. You think your friends don't appreciate you? Try this now and thank me later...

Just on time, Lunch's ready! Wait, you weren't really thinking I was going to invite you now were you?